Action Movies and High Heels

July 25, 2015 By 1 Comment

It’s a combo not seen often, but two friends this week sent me this Youtube clip—and its silly and fun.  Thank you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RZi6NCuLbQ&feature=youtu.be

I would love to see more action movies with high heels; it would for sure up the difficulty factor.  Try fighting crime in stilettos Batman. Or space battles in heels Avengers, Luke or Han. Even Princess Lela in the gold bikini (Iconic image for millions of boys- now men) didn’t don a pair of heels, which clearly would have been a high heel sporting opportunity.

They tried to add high heels in the second Ironman movie with Gwyneth Paltrow (Miss Potts) and Scarlett Johansson (Natalie Rushman/Natasha Romanoff) trying to walk out of Tony Stark’s office together in very high Christian Louboutin shoes. I say try because their gait was so awkward even my friend turned to me in the movie and mentioned how they didn’t know how to walk in heels that high—they should take lessons from me. Apparently some one else noticed this because in the next scene, getting out of the car and walking into party/ reception Miss Potts is wearing a much lower heel and not sporting the red soles so famous on the Louboutin brand. This is not something I think many people would notice, but to the shoe fanatic I am—well it was a glaring continuity error.

But why stop at action films? Why not sports films as well? Chariots of Fire in Heels.  White Men Can’t Jump in Heels. Rocky in Heels. King Pin in Heels. Seabiscuit in Heels—ok now I’m getting ridiculous. But it was kind of fun to think of the oddest combinations.

Happy Sunday

Laura

 

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There was an Old Women who Lived in a Shoe… What Happens in Vegas…

July 19, 2015 By Leave a Comment

Most of the old nursery rhythms are sinister and/or political in nature—Thanks Mother Goose—sweet dreams. Ever really think about the words to Rock a Bye Baby? Frightening!

“There was an old woman who lived in a shoe.

She had so many children; she didn’t know what to do.

She gave them some broth without any bread;

And whipped them all soundly and put them to bed.”

The earliest record of “Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe” was printed in Joseph Ritson’s “Gammer Gurton’s Garland” in 1794. The rhyme is reputedly linked to Queen Caroline, who had eight children and her lack of control over parliament.  Is this true? I have no idea. It will be like trying to explain Don Trump running for office in 2265. No one will understand or really care.

I didn’t live in a shoe so much as fall into a shoe. On a recent trip to Vegas—what happens in Vegas… except when your friends take pictures to document your idiotic behavior.

In the fall, Christian Louboutin is opening a store in Vegas. Will I be there? Ah.. Do birds fly? Anyhow in the Cosmopolitan Hotel to garner attention, there is a huge Louboutin shoe. I could not resist the photo op. All good until I fell in said shoe—and literally could not get out. The drop is nearly 2 feet and on a downward angle. And I’m wearing a skirt. I was laughing to hard I had lost any muscle strength with tears streaming down my face. It was funny. But no I really could not get out, not without flashing the entire audience of people watching and also laughing. Oh there were others taking pictures as well—did I mention it was funny? The more I tried to get out the more I was laughing – it was hopeless. My friend was on the ground in stitches—no help. Finally a group of Italians, very little English came by and saw the predicament. They vaulted my out of the shoe— grazie mille! Moral of this fable? I love shoes, but do not wish to live in one.

Laura

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Dude Challenged Himself To Wear Heels All Day And Wanted To Die

July 11, 2015 By Leave a Comment

“I want death. Please let me die.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylNy3cM12tA

Really– I think this says it all! Do I need to expand on this? It’s hard being a girl! Our clothes cost more, are not as comfortable and don’t fit as well. I just wish this guy had to shave his legs, wax his eyes brows (or other parts), wear a bra, maybe some pantyhose, maybe some pointy pumps, apply mascara and any other numerous painful events that are just part of being a girl.

I commend this dude for making it the whole day, even if he called quits on his evening plans in his high heels. Brandon reflected on how some guys love to talk about how girls are irritable or moody, but now, having “walked in women’s shoes,” he might begin to understand.

It was still a very solid effort! Kudos to you Brandon Cohen of Bro Bible!

Laura

PS, Thank you Susan for the link

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I want Minions!

July 5, 2015 By Leave a Comment

I want Minions! No I really do. However, I don’t want to be evil to acquire them… but… I would so utilize a staff of hundreds, the massive amount of good I could accomplish. I can tell you right now potholes in the road would cease to exist, along with litter and everyone’s yard would look fabulous… just a few ideas. I joke all the time that I want a clone. I really need a clone. While I’m being stupidity unrealistic, why not 3 clones? We clone cats and sheep they do nothing. Why not me? I pay taxes. I contribute to society. I can be as useful as a cat or sheep. My posse of Laura’s and I would work! Why stop at 3? Why not a dozen or 100 clones? Now that’s just being crazy and irresponsible. How could possibly keep track of that many copies of myself or feed them? Have you ever seen a family with more that 3 kids? It’s a complete chaotic nightmare. I’m trying to ease my workload, not create more.

It’s not that I’m all that important– I’m just busy. Now I realize busy is my own doing. But this solo Laura works a day job and does comedy at night, tries to write and still have a social life. And I would do more if I just had more time and money etc.…I’m a super hero without any super powers, except my fabulous shoes. I have a crazy amount of ideas– I think are good. And the unrealistic sense that I should try to accomplish all of them. But it would be really helpful if I could have my clones working so this Laura could take a nap!

But wonder if the stand-up clone gets really famous and tries to take the credit? I think Gallagher tried this scenario back a few years ago and it blew up in his face.  Lousy clones…trying to take credit for borrowed success. Wonder if my clone gets cynical and jaded? Being on the road all the time while I’m hanging at home? And she starts bad-mouthing about me all around town. How to I punish essentially myself? There’s so much clone etiquette to learn. 


Wonder if she starts hanging out with other clones? And they want to start a clone union? Maybe I’ll kill her off and start fresh. Or is that rude? Is it suicide or murder to kill your clone? Kill your clone! That’s a great horror movie idea! But clone would have to be spelled with a K because that makes it scarier. Clearly I have thought about this way too much. It would probably get weird. It’s one of those things that seem good in theory. Like whip cream in bed and polygamy to men…

Anyhow Sandra Bullock rocked these Rupert Sanderson pumps at the premiere of Minions, which opens this week. Since this is the closest I’ll ever get to having a minion—I would love a pair. Thank you Nancy for the suggestion.

Back to work for me- minus my minions and clones.

Happy Sunday

Laura

 

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